Cynical in the Pacific North-West!


So, wow. I’m possibly the worst blogger ever. I have one other post from a year and a half ago. Impressive! Obviously a lot had changed since then. First off, I got married! So that was really… interesting. Moving on… Our house was foreclosed on, yay! Actually, I’m not really too beat up over it. That had to have been the worst investment possible. Plus, it gave me the perfect excuse to get the hell out of California, which I’ve been trying to do since I was about two. So, like pioneers on the Oregon Trail (seriously still an awesome game) we packed up what we could in a huge, white, pedophile van along with about a billion animals and headed to Washington State. The land of beautiful greenery and meth labs. I’d say it was a serious upgrade! Ooh, oooh, and!… No mariachi music wakes me up at 8 a.m., ever! Making this my own personal paradise. We actually do really like it here though, I don’t think we will ever go back to California except for the occasional family obligation. We got a cute little place up here that was owned to a glue gun addict, so that’s been full of surprises! But this place is less than a third of our mortgage, so we are stoked to be here. We have 2 bedrooms and a fully fenced yard for a grand total of… ***drum-roll*** $400 a month including trash and water! So yeah, California: go fuck yourself in a $800,000 condo by the beach. I will gladly take a 3 bedroom home on 20+ acres for $120,000 and shove it up your ass. (Yes, that is really what I can get up here.) On another note, I have 2 “jobs” right now, if you can really count them as jobs… I work about 4-7 hours a week at a pizza place and three days a week I watch a 4 year old for about 6-10 hours. I don’t really know what I will be making from the sitting gig since I haven’t been paid yet and she is just going to pay me whatever she can, but I will take what I can get! I really like Rylie, the kid, anyways. The pizza place is cool except for one really sleazy perv named Joe. That is a story for another day though, as my husband just got home, therefore I can’t write without thinking my every thought is being monitored. Not to say that he is like that, but if there is someone around me when I’m writing I always feel like they are looking over my shoulder. Sooooo, next time, let’s talk about Joe and his penchant for under aged girls!

[Update on Joe since I never got back to it: He was a super creepy dude that always had underage girls hanging around work, waiting for him. He’s like, 30, so it was extra sleazy. Last I heard he got his underaged girlfriend pregnant, but then got drunk and beat her, causing her to miscarry. Then he apparently fled to Oregon to hide. Nice guy, huh? Of course he got fired a week after I quit working at Sahara Pizza. Why couldn’t I have been around to see that??]


This Christmas…


This Christmas has been different than any other in my lifetime. Certainly not in the music department, but in over all consumerism, or the lack there of. We have dropped at least 10% in Christmas spending compared to 2009. Two days before Christmas and the stores are crowded, but you can still find parking. That’s not a good sign for the mall stores. Honestly though, it’s not a bad thing, in my opinion. Americans have been (and still do) spending more money on Christmas gifts than any other country in the world. The only thing we think about is the gifts we must buy, making Christmas the most stressful time of the year for anyone not a child or rich! We get time off work, that is unpaid for most of us working class people, and then spend more time and money on gifts, travel, not to mention my damn roof leaks every friggen time it rains, but I can’t friggen afford to fix it during the holidays! I mean seriously, wouldn’t Christmas be better if we could just take a few days off and relax with friends and family? Or even just to sit in your underwear for a few days watching CSI Miami? Well, this next year, maybe we will all get what we really want for Christmas; a lot less Christmas! Every Christmas before this one, I’ve been like all the other poor mall drones; saving for months and picking up extra hours/jobs just so I can afford to get a gift for everyone on my list. Then of course come the debate of how much you should spend on each person, did you forget anyone, if I get this for this person will this other person be jealous? I mean, how is this fun? Then, every single year, I end up feeling a bit awkward when at least half of my family and friends didn’t think to get me anything after I spend tons of time and money trying to find the perfect gift for them… This, and the fact that I’m unemployed and behind on my mortgage, is why I’m not buying a single Christmas gift this year. I’m also not driving all over freaking Southern California to see everyone that expects me to be there for Christmas. My mom and in-laws get Christmas, but that’s the only day of the holiday season that they are going to get. I no longer feel compelled to make a big friggen stink about this holiday, I mean, I’m not even religious! But all of this is due to the recession we have gripped about for the last few years. So I say hooray! One good thing the recession has done is metaphorically kill the American Christmas. Go recession! Now, if only we could do something about every store around playing Christmas music from Halloween to New Years! But there is always next year!